Thursday, February 24, 2011


 Recently my life feels like it belongs to a stranger. I am blessed with so much, truly am a thankful person. But, hold on, I miss my man of almost three decades. He now lives with a new wife, walked out of my life, has made no effort to stay in touch with two very special grandchildren. Why do I miss a person that would cheat, lie and leave? It is especially hurtful to know we can not have a conversation about our children, grandchildren or his precious parents. Divorce is so wrong! It hurts so many
I am angry and tired. I do not know where my home is anymore. He wants his wife to believe he never loved me. That all I was or interested in are things!
Just a note here for the record, I refuse to believe his lies. They sound so much like Satan's words. However, the Great I am is my Prince of Peace. I will recover, I will find my path and hope not to be looking back.
It is when seeing Liam with out him, or visiting with Tori or Austin and his name comes up. My heart aches for what should have been the best years.
I am doing my best to go on, things always are better when the sun shines. Today was cold and raining, the grey sky looked bleak.
Being still and listening to the Lord is what I should be doing. Instead my weakness comes out in angry thoughts and feelings of great sadness.
I pray my daughters, grandchildren do not follow in his foot steps and run away. I am wondering if that grass that looked so green is hard to mow?
So perhaps the changes ahead are for the better, suppose I will find happiness in helping others, Spending time with old friends, making a new life.
I believe it can happen, my heart will heal, my brain will not dwell on the negative. Each day will be an adventure.
JuJu's blessings are usually appreciated when I slow down enough to spend more time in God's word. Setting at Christ's feet listening.
Spring is on it's way.
Thank you dear Lord for the blessings! The grandchildren  are adorable, my daughters so good to me, son-in-laws that I love like they are mine. I love my brother, nephews.
A promotion at work to keep me busy! Good friends to hang out with.
A vacation to Tennessee coming up soon.
I think this blogging is contagious! I think writing my feelings down help lift  my spirits....

No comments:

Post a Comment